The old scripts my father and grandfather lived by aren’t going to be there for young men today, and most of them know it. What I see in my office is two responses. Some guys check out: if the game is rigged, why play. Others go all in on the grind and try to beat the system alone. Neither one builds a life. 

Barrett and I talk about that split, how therapy has changed for younger men over the last decade, why connection through a screen is cotton candy, where cannabis and alcohol fit and where they don’t, and why it’s gotten harder for men to find places where they’re useful to the people around them. This one is a conversation, not an interview.

If you define masculinity as constant warfare, you are setting yourself up for emotional exhaustion in your marriage. Author Stephen Mansfield joins us to explain why the warrior script fails at home.

Many men believe that being against something is the same as going to war with it. In the Episode of American Masculinity we discuss how this mentality creates a divide in healthy relationships, leaving men drained and unable to offer the support their spouses actually need. It is possible to pursue mastery of yourself without treating your home life like a battlefield. 

Nick Papadopoulos is an executive coach who has led men's groups for over 22 years and co-wrote The Men's Group: A Novel of Messy Friendships. One of his clients, a COO, came to him with a newborn at home, no intimacy in his marriage, a father dying of cancer, and a losing battle with his CFO. He'd tried talking to the neighborhood dads over beers, but all they wanted to discuss was the beer and the game. He needed a real conversation.We unpack why men's circles shrink as their lives get bigger, how a partner ends up as a man's therapist, coach, and priest all at once, and why "shoulder to shoulder" is where most guys connect but can't be where it stops.